Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2014
Directed by: Jonathan Liebesman

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is the retelling of the comic book by Kevin Eastman and Peter Laird, then later children's cartoon from the 80's and 90's of four turtles that were transformed by a mutagen into mutant turtles that had humanlike abilities and intelligence.  The film is produced by Michael Bay.  The four turtles were raised as brothers and trained in the art of Ninjutsu by their surrogate father Splinter, a rat that was also mutated by the mutagen.  Splinter named the turtles after his favorite Renaissance artists, Leonardo, Donatello, Michelangelo, and Raphael.  Like every rendition of the Ninja Turtles the story begins with the Turtles crossing paths with April O'Neil(Megan Fox) a curious reporter that is threatened when she digs too deep into the Foot Clan.  The Foot Clan are a band of ninja thieves that are led by The Shredder.  The Shredder is a lethal and dangerous ninja who will eventually see the Turtles as his ultimate enemy. 

This will probably be the worst movie I will see this year.  As someone who grew up watching the old cartoon and later the first live action film versions I had hoped I would have a great nostalgic feeling of my childhood the same way The new Transformers films make me feel.  I was let down.  The filmmakers tried a little too hard to please everyone and ended up picking little bits from every version to create the origins of the characters.  This idea just doesn't work and the origin story we are presented with isn't one that's accepted by the audience.  The film also features too much of Megan Fox instead of featuring the Turtles as it should.  Another aspect that bothered me about this film is the Shredder.  He looks too much like a miniature Megatron from the Transformers films.  The Turtles themselves are not portrayed the best way, Michelangelo who is suppose to be the funny one isn't funny at all and only comes across creepy.  Raphael is the closest to done well but the chemistry that you would expect from the Turtles and isn't there sours his character.  Donatello is the best of the Turtles as far as funny goes but he doesn't get the screen time he deserves.  Leonardo is too flat and is boring to watch.  The most disappointing part of this film is the fight scenes are huge let downs.  When you go to a movie by Micheal Bay you usually know to expect a terrible story with great effects and action.  This film, while the effects were great had terrible action.  The fights were boring and the other action sequences were too dull.  To sum it up I can't think of anyone I would recommend this film to.  I really hope any parents who want to introduce their kids to the same Turtles they enjoyed as kids will just get the original Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles or Turtles II Secret of the Ooze with the killer Vanilla Ice Song.

Guardians of the Galaxy

Guardians of the Galaxy (2014)
Directed by James Gunn

Guardians of the Galaxy is the newest release in the Marvel/Disney Universe Starring Chris Pratt, Zoe Saldana, and Dave Bautista with the voices of Bradley Cooper and Vin Diesel.  Guardians of the Galaxy follows the exploits of Peter Quill(Chris Pratt) a man who was taken from Earth when he was a child and raised on other worlds.  Quill became a thief and took on the self made mantle of Star Lord.  Quill is sent after a relic that is a crucial part of a war between two alien races the Nova Empire and an extremist for the Kree Empire named Ronan The Accuser(Lee Pace).  Ronan wants to wipe out the Nova Empire and needs the relic to strike a deal with Thanos(Josh Brolin).  Thanos is an all powerful being that was seen at the end of the film The Avengers.  Along the way to deliver the relic Star Lord crosses paths with Gamora, a living weapon that wants the relic for her own reasons and he also crosses the mercenaries Rocket(Bradley Cooper) and Groot(Vin Diesel).  Rocket is a genetically altered raccoon with a lot of anger issues and Groot is a large tree creature that is limited in his ability to speak only being able to say I AM GROOT.  Rocket and Groot aren't so interested in the relic as they are in the bounty on Star Lord's head.  As the four of them smash into each other in their journey they come across Drax the Destroyer(Dave Bautista).  Drax is on a mission to avenge the murder of hid wife and daughter at the hands of Ronan.  These five outcasts somehow band together to challenge Ronan and his forces to try to stop him from wiping out Billions of people.

This movie was great.  I'm a big fan of superhero movies so I knew I would like this film but I didn't expect to like it as much as I did.  Not being as mainstream as characters like Iron Man or Captain America these characters are a lot less known so it was nice not to know what to expect from them.  Another great thing about this film is it stands alone unlike any of the other films in the Marvel universe.  You can go see this movie without having to know about any other superheroes or any other films.  It's a refreshing movie in a genre that is punching so many films out and continues to plan on so many films that there will always be a potential for a backlash of the genre.  The film is not for young kids.  There were a couple of times in this film that it will seem inappropriate that there are whole toy lines of this film for kids because there is some very adult humor in it but very funny humor.  The soundtrack is very good for this film.  You will have the song Hooked on a Feeling stuck in your head for days after you watch it.  I was pleasantly surprised about a couple things in this film.  First I was very surprised by the performance of Dave Bautista as Drax.  When I saw he was in the film I expected a poor performance from him like so many athletes that turn to film but the character was the perfect fit for him and a good fit for the chemistry of the film.  The other part of this film that I was surprised by is the character Groot.  Considering his limited vocab and the way he looks it amazes me how much he drives the story.  I figured Chris Praitt was going to be the favorite of the film or maybe even Rocket but I think most people will come away from this film with Groot being their favorite character.  He's like some strange cross of The Hulk meets Dumbo.  Overall, I think anyone can enjoy this film, unless you can't wrap your head around science fiction then your loss.